It's been over a month since my half marathon and in that time I have been very unmotivated. I just can't seem to get myself up for much of anything. People complain about the weather in the Pacific Northwest and people getting Seasonal Affective Disorder from the lack of sunshine... I feel like I've got something like that with the cold temperatures. I am a total cold weather wimp, and believe that snow is beautiful and fun to ski in, but cold cold weather is hard. I've let myself get into a strange cycle that isn't quite me.
First, I'm not sleeping well. I tend to be very tired at 7pm but get lost in some project that doesn't put me into bed until after 10pm. I usually try to pump milk after 9:30pm and then go to bed. Rachel has been having a hard time with bed time and has been waking up more during the night, often with a wet bed that requires a full change of sheets. I've been up as early as 5am for some work activities and Jason has been trying to get up with Rachel at 6:30am on non-work days and let me rest until Ava gets up (or until I wake her up, dying to feed her, which is more common on non-work days). My 'UP Jawbone' lets me know that I'm sleeping 6-7.5 hours per night, but waking up a time or two and not getting much deep sleep. I'm lying in bed awake much more than I ever have, despite being tired.
Second, I can't get into a rhythm with a schedule. Holidays were lovely but I'm kind of glad to be back to 'normal' with Jason working again and my work schedule getting solidified. I have moved to 3 days per week at the clinic but my exact hours are a little up in the air as we sort some things out. I was planning on teaching three exercise classes a week: two early mornings and one evening. But the interest has been low and we'll probably scrap the classes. I'm a little relieved because it's tough on our family to make those times work, even though I really love the concept of teaching exercise classes and hope to make it work in the future.
Third, I am terrible at sticking to my exercise plans. I've barely been running at all because it's yucky and cold and slippery. I've tried three runs that I've stopped and walked back because of the ice. I am unlikely to make it to the gym to get on the treadmill. I have been riding the trainer a fair amount, but my effort level on it is poor. Some strength work has been happening... but nothing like what I had hoped by this point. I've barely made it to the pool in the last little while. My UP Jawbone pedometer sadly tells me all the time that I'm not getting my goal of 10,000 steps a day, and I don't even care enough to change it. Very unlike my competitive self.
Lastly, it seems like it's been harder to get outside and do stuff with the kids. Dragging Rachel away from her toys inside is work, and bundling up both kids for the cold is more work than fun these days. When Rachel was a newborn I went snowshoeing and nordic skiing with her a lot. I winter hiked with her when she was 14-15 months quite a bit. But I can't seem to get both the girls out to do much except the odd walk to the library or a visit to the pool if Jason can come, too.
I'm going to get on the trainer now... maybe for 15 min or so.
This weekend we are going on a hut trip so I really hope that helps to motivate me. The following week I will be going to South Carolina and might get a chance to run in some warmer weather, which will be nice.
I'm not sure what kick in the pants I need to get exercising, sleeping, and energetic again... but I need one. Feel free to boot me and get that Lazy Stick that keeps hitting me gone forever!
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