October picture highlights

Jason's sister Karen came to visit for Rachel's third birthday, and although she already posted her own blog and pictures, we will too!  We are so lucky Karen came to visit and play with us, meet Ava, and celebrate Rachel's 3rd birthday.  Thanks Aunt Karen!

Rachel seems so grown up now, and so smart.  If you can keep her focused on a task, she will do it very well.  She is better than I am at the game of memory... if she is willing to sit still and pay attention.  In soccer and in gymnastics, we are working really hard to stand still in line and listen to the coaches' instructions.  (Most of the time, though, Rachel is running around like crazy doing her own thing.)

Recently playing a lot of marble works, thanks to Aunt Cynthia

Karen came with us to our first gymnastics class and to the pool.  She helped us make cupcakes, helped us host family for a dinner, and then joined Rachel at her birthday party.  We got a pumpkin and then played with friends and had food.

Kelsey, Lily, Rachel and Bodhi play behind our house

Cousins Jeannie and Lily help Rachel hold Ava

Rachel is often lost in her own creative play and on her own agenda.  She has been healthy and weighs 29.6 pounds and is 36.5" tall, making her 25th percentile for height and weight. You may remember at 12 months old we got quite scared because she wasn't gaining weight, despite a healthy appetite.  She still seems much smaller than many of her peers, but we're glad she is healthy and growing appropriately.  She is going to preschool Tues and Thurs full days and is comfortable and happy with this routine.  We go to the library every week and usually have another outing like the children's museum or the zoo.

At the library this past week, I wanted to find another book by an author we really like.  Rachel shocked me with her ability to remember things, since it has been weeks since we have read the Panda Palace and have only taken it out from the library once before:

Me: "Rachel, I wish I could remember who writes The Panda Palace."
Rachel: "Stephanie Calmenson, Mommy.  Why?"
Me: "Good memory!  Wow!  I want to look for another book by her.  Let's go to the 'C' section."
Rachel: "Why?"
Me: "Because Calmenson starts with 'C'"
Rachel: "Why?"
Me: ....  stumped ... again....unable to answer all the 'why' questions over and over.

Anyway, bedtimes have been way better with Rachel.  Possibly because she is taking a shorter nap but possibly because of her sticker chart and her motivation to watch movies.  She has certainly had a lot more screen time since Ava was born, and loves watching movies.  We try our best to limit screen time and to make it a reward for things like great bedtimes.  Since Rachel is back to sleeping at 7:30pm, she seems to be waking up early again.  Jason spends many of his mornings from 5:30-6:45am convincing Rachel to go back to bed or to play in her room quietly until Momo's (the clock) eyes open.  But motivate her with some movie time if she goes to bed well and stays in her room until Momo's eyes open... and she will often succeed.

Jason finally recovered from his own 100km race and spent many hours in October coaching cross country.  His girls team and one boy went to States last weekend and did well.  Now cross country is less demanding until the last meet just before Thanksgiving in Arizona.  School is in full swing and Jason is involved in a million things with school and is working long hours.

Ava is in a nice routine at home and doing well... except she won't take a bottle.  She will take a few sips and then reject it.  We've tried many different nipples, positions, temperatures, times of day, times of the feed... but nothing seems to work yet.  Everyone keeps telling me not to worry because she will take it if she gets hungry enough... but so far I'm not sure.  She had her first morning at school this past week to see if she would take some without me around... and she took 3-4 oz. in the 4+ hours she was there.  It's a start - but she's going to need to get better at it if I'm going to be able to leave her for more than 3.5 hours of work.  Ava's routine hasn't changed much since the last post - 3 to 4 naps per day, sleeping 12 hours at night with 1-2 wake ups for milk.  She is rolling over well from back to tummy and likes to sit and stand more, but can't really hang out in the Bumbo chair for very long yet.  She is full of gurgles, 'ah-goo' sounds, and blowing raspberries.

I have been focused on my work options.  I have been contacting clinics, meeting with clinic owners, and looking at business ideas.  I have made a decision and accepted an offer and will post more about this in another blog shortly.  I plan to return to work as early as mid December, providing we can figure out Ava's schedule and bottle at daycare.

I have been swimming 2 times per week and running 3 times per week, and not much else.  The odd bit of strength work and the odd hike or bike.  My swims and runs have been really tiring me out, and I have to keep reminding myself to take things slow.  It seems like it's taking so long to get fit again!  I ran 7.2 miles slowly this morning while pushing Ava, which I think is the longest run I have done in over 2 years.  I still have a lot of running to do before my half marathon on Dec 7th - it will be 13 miles and it needs to be faster than what I'm currently running.  I have a friend that is willing to run my long weekend runs with me, and I really hope we can keep it going because it's my favorite time of my week.

View out our master bedroom... the mountains are white and ski season is here!

The house continues to take up a ridiculous amount of time and money.  Our fence is now finished and our radon mitigation should be done this week.  Hopefully our solar panels will be turned on by the utility company soon (it's taken them 10 weeks so far to get out to the house and put in a meter... very frustrating).  We need to stain the fence, which is going to be a challenge with the ever-changing weather and two girls trying to help.  We started to stain, but I was unhappy with the red color so I removed the stain and plan to start again.  Also, we had some settlement during the floods and some pipes were bent, so we need to get help to lift the ground and straighten out the pipes before they might break and flood.  Our windshield on the car should get replaced today, after some mis-communication at the dealership this morning.  Then we can put on our winter tires, clean up our garage and basement, and be ready for winter!

Rachel helps stain our fence

I'm still trying to figure out the best way to post videos and photos, since we each have a phone and then we have our real camera and each of those three devices requires its own system... but I'll post what I have and hope you can enjoy it!

Videos:

2003 to 2013 ... Can't believe it's been 10 years

I was at the library the other day with my girls and noticed something when I looked around at all the other parents... they all seemed kind of old.  You know, at least in their mid-thirties or older.  And then I realized something horrible - I look like that too!  The gray hairs are creeping in, I'm going to be 35 next year, and I'm no spring chicken.  Now, I don't believe age has much to do with anything - I've seen an 80 year old complete a marathon and I've treated 40 year olds that were weaker and in worse shape than a 94 year old patient I've had.

But the craziest thing about it being 2013 is that it's been 10 years since 2003.  Crazy, right?  Let me back you up to my 2003 and explain why that year was such a memorable one for me.

Jan 1, 2003 - wake up on Fraser Island, Australia, where I was traveling with two great friends, and enjoying the life of typical backpackers.
Live in Australia and train 3-4 times per day on and off the field hockey pitch until March.

April 2003 - Trip to Cuba.  Although I remember Cuba being filled with poverty, filth, injuries, illnesses, and theft... I was with some amazing people.  Aoibhinn, KT, Kristal, Steph J, Leslie, Julia, Forbes, Fausty, Sheena, Tinger, Buker, Deb Cuthbert, Dana, Rushton, Jenny J, Dr T.  As a player and a person, I had loads of confidence and fantastic friends beside me.

May 2003 - Trip to New Zealand.  What's not to love about playing hockey with friends in New Zealand?  Then a fun group of us went to a fantastic tournament called Cal Cup, and we had a blast.

June 2003 - won nationals in Edmonton playing for a BC side and felt like a rock star.

July 2003 - hosted a 4 nations tournament in Vancouver against Chile, Wales and Scotland in front of friends and family.  I was living in some 2 month sublet, basically out of a backpack, with very little money and very little responsibility.  Field hockey and friends related to field hockey meant everything to me.

August 2003 - Pan American Games in Santo Domingo.  This tournament served as a qualification for the 2004 Olympics in Athens, and we choked.  I was devastated.  My folks were there.  The guys also failed to qualify on the men's side.  It was hugely disappointing.  But being a part of a major games was still exciting.  Maybe not as amazing as my first major games (Commonwealth in 2002), but still exciting.  And I didn't know it at the time, but this would be my last major games.

We spent the fall of 2004 trying to rebuild our team and putting our sights toward the next World Cup.  We lost many athletes and our coach, and a new phase started.  I spent the fall working as a special needs para-educator in elementary schools and having fun with the team and friends in Vancouver.  I was trying to decide if being a physical therapist was what I really wanted to do and how I would make that work with my first passion of being a field hockey player.

Now, 10 years later, things are quite different.  I'm married to an amazing guy I didn't know anything about then.  We have two fun daughters and live in Colorado in a real house.  We have stuff accumulated and are reasonably settled.  There is no field hockey here.  I miss it and all those people that I knew then.  I see a handful of my old hockey friends every time I go home.  I am a physical therapist.  I'm trying to balance out my role as a mother with my role as a therapist.  I'm trying to get back into some level of shape after having Ava this past summer, but running a 5km under 30 min would be a challenge, and I'm embarrassed about that.  My daily excitement is laughing about something Rachel said, giggling with Ava, and trying to get out to exercise.  There's way less time for friends.  I'm not a part of a team in any way.  I dream of traveling and I hope to live out of a backpack again.  I think of those people that I knew that year so often, and wish I could see them more.

It makes me feel old.  Looking through my hockey albums makes me sad.  I wish I had more caps and had been to more major games.  I wish I could coach on the island and give back to all those people that taught me so much.  On paper, I really didn't do that much as a player on the junior or senior Canadian team or for my Vikes (college team).  But I loved it all.  I wish I could still play the sport I gave so much of myself to.

Next weekend, the Vikes will have a huge reunion weekend at the CIS championships.  Buzz, my college coach, will celebrate her 30th year and there will be a huge to-do for her and her program.  I wish I could go.  Buzz, her program, and my Vikes teammates were so huge for me in life.  I feel so distant from all this now.

Thankfully, when I look at my girls, I smile.  They fill that void in some other way, because they make my heart smile inside.

We're gonna miss this....

Before I had Ava, I wrote a list of many concerns about having two kids.  I think now I can address many of these concerns and wish I could have told my June-self not to worry.

While I was pregnant, I pleaded with the baby to be healthy and 'please be a great sleeper!'. I think it worked relatively well.  Ava sleeps now for 11 hours at night and gets up once, sometimes twice, to nurse.  She only needs to nurse for about 10 minutes most of the time, and she never cries and cries at night for no reason.  All the worries I had about Ava waking Rachel up and Jason and I killing each other when we were grumpy and sleep-deprived never came to anything... at least not yet!

We have been so blessed through this journey so far and have so much to be thankful for:
1) Ava is healthy and is a very easy baby.  
2) Jason had the summer off to be with us as a family.  
3) Rachel has been sleeping quite well and regularly sleeps past 6am now.  Jason usually gets up with her and lets me sleep until he needs to get ready to go or until Ava gets up.  This gives me the energy I need to deal with Rachel during the day.
4) Rachel goes to preschool Tues and Thurs for the day, which gives me a chance to catch up and have a break from her.  It allows her opportunities to socialize and do art projects and songs we don't do at home.  
5) Rachel has become much more independent throughout this process, and is a great help to me with Ava most of the time.  She has been less needy and less jealous than I expected.
6) Rachel and Ava seem to have some understanding of each other in ways that are wonderful.  For example, Ava can scream and cry in the car and Rachel can stay asleep through it in her own car seat.  Rachel seems to ignore me if she sees me snuggling with Ava in the middle of the night, and doesn't complain.
7) Rachel is learning to be quiet when Ava needs to sleep.  It's a challenge, but Rachel is doing better with this than I thought.  And Ava actually naps quite well during the day in her own crib, despite noise around her at times.
8) My phone.  I know it's ridiculous, but having an iphone has made life way easier on me this time around.  I can check email and surf the net if I need to keep myself awake or entertained while I nurse Ava.  A phone is small enough to hold and operate with one hand, and also has games on it.  I will admit I have played way too many games on my phone in the last three months.
9) Jason's job.  Back in the Spring we weren't sure what Jason's teaching scenario would be for this year.  We are so lucky to have him working enough so that I can stay home.  It's not a good financial time for us, but we are able to have me home without pay for a handful of months to allow a great start for Ava.

Things that are challenging for us now include:
- Ava won't take a bottle.  We're pulling our hair out on this one.  It feels like it's trapping me from being able to organize going back to work, daycare, finances, exercise, any hope of a date, etc.  We will continue to try and have plenty of suggestions from friends... so please cross your fingers on this one for us!
- Money.  I feel pretty guilty being at home not earning any money these days.  We won't be able to do it for much longer.  We're really trying to trim our spending, which means less travel and less ambitious adventures and outings.  It's not as fun.
- Jason is working long hours.  He's often gone from 7am until 6pm.  He'll continue coaching daily until Oct 26, and then cross country coaching will slow down.
- It's a balance to work out living with one car.  We really like the idea of being a one car family... but a second car seems like a great luxury that would make our lives much easier if we had it.
- As always, we wish we had close friends or family near by to help us with the odd night to go out or have fun or run errands together.

There are often times when this time of our life seems all consuming.  Our lives are almost all about our girls.  We don't go out much.  Jason and I don't spend much time together as a couple.  We aren't very social.  We're not saving up any money.  We're not climbing any corporate ladders.  We look forward to a time in the future when our girls can be less dependent on us and we can adventure, travel, relax, and laugh more together again - as a couple or as a family.  BUT... right now we have the joy of enjoying Ava's soft skin and her adorable smile.  Every day we get to hear Rachel make us laugh with a creative story or something hilarious that comes out of our mouth.  Our girls are the most precious things in our life.  They are so rewarding and so amazing.

There's a country song by Trace Adkins called "You're Gonna Miss This"  ... if you haven't listened to it, I really recommend you do.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIBediEAcUQ