April desert races and training

On Easter weekend, our family headed to Fruita, CO for a trail running festival. 

We left the Front Range heat on Friday morning and drove to Frisco, and had a picnic lunch in a snowy playground.  Then we drove toward Utah and headed to our campsite in the Colorado National Monument.  The canyons and red rocks were beautiful.

Camping in the busy Friday night was a bit difficult.  Ava had a hard time sleeping in her travel crib inside our giant tent (thanks, Amber!).  It stated to rain unexpectedly sometime in the night, and we weren't sure if the tent would stay dry. (It did.)  Ava ended up sleeping in my sleeping bag with me, so I didn't sleep much at all.

Sat morning we woke up to pouring rain at 5:30am and jumped in the car to drive Jason to his race.  Everything was clay and muck and wet.  We dropped Jason off to run his marathon and then tried to figure out what to do for a few hours.  It was my 35th birthday and I was unimpressed with things.  But by the time we saw Jason at the finish line with a big smile on his face, it was all good again.  It was his 8th marathon and he reached his goal of negative split (running the second half faster than the first half).  

Sat afternoon I got to nap, the sun came out, we saw friends, enjoyed the Dinosaur Museum, and had a nice campsite dinner with friends.  Rachel enjoyed several Easter egg hunts around the campsite.  Jason did much more with Ava that night so I could sleep.  

R goes potty next to car at campsite while wearing bunny mask

Sunday morning it was beautiful and sunny and everything had dried out.  I ran my half marathon and really enjoyed the scenery.  I was anxious going into it because my longest training run was only 9.3 miles, and I hadn't spent much time doing anything technical.  The first 6-7 miles felt good.  I was pretty happy at 10 miles on top of a big climb, even though my legs were hurting.  The descent was really fun, even if my legs complained the whole time.  Then at 12 miles, when we returned to flat double track, I shuffled along to the finish, slowly but satisfied and just trying not get get injured. 

Rachel, Ava and Jason were cheering at the finish, with Easter eggs all around.  We watched friends finish and then packed up and drove home.

Jason has a couple short races planned (5-10km) and I have 2 triathlons coming up.  I do an Olympic distance tri June 7 and then my half ironman on June 29.  I have a lot of work to do in all 3 disciplines to make this happen.  The next 2 months must be better about training/resting/eating well/working less.  

I'm actually pretty tired of being on a training plan, and motivation is waning.  When I have a hard time finding the motivation, these are some things I think about:

- Other people I know that have completed a half ironman, and they seemed so badass (Anna and Aoibhinn, Jen M, Jason, Shelie B, Sarah M, Kelly O, etc.) and I want to feel that length of a race and that challenge and succeed.

- I want to feel strong and fit again.  In the last 5 years I've been pregnant or nursing for most of it and it's been a tough toll on my body.  I do want to be confident in a bikini again but I also want to be able to go do things and feel strong and powerful.  I'm pretty much back to the weight I was before I was pregnant at all, and completing a half will be a real achievement to celebrate being done with the whole pregnancy process.

But when it's all said and done, I want to just camp and hike and walk and play outside again, instead of having specific workout needs all the time.  In order to train for something all the time (even if we do it half way because that's all we can manage), it means Jason and I are often trading our time.  One stays with the kids while the other goes and runs.  This means we do way less as a family and, therefore, as a couple.  I miss doing things outside as a family and I miss playing outside WITH Jason.  Right now splitting up is the only way we know how to do it, but I'm really looking forward to July!

Good bye ski season

Skiing pictures from March

A few weeks ago, we had a lucky opportunity for a family to watch Ava so that Jason and I could take Rachel skiing.  The ski season this year has been awesome, and the snow is still decent - even now in May.

We had a fun day taking Rachel to Keystone.  We were able to park in our friends' parking spot near the gondola, in a covered parking area.  This made things really easy, and made us wish we could buy a place near the slopes!

Rachel did an amazing job skiing.  She skis beside us and holds on to our poles.  She loves to go fast.  She doesn't really know how to turn or stop, but she can balance well and hold up her own weight.  She doesn't love to ride up on the chairlift, and doesn't like it if the lift attendant touches her to help.  She wears a little backpack with a handle that we don't attach the harness to, but it allows us to lift her up on to the chair lift.  She carries Nunu in her little pack so he can ski, too.

Jason took a few runs on his own, but mostly we were there to ski with Rachel.  It's hard work for one adult to ski with Rachel.  She takes long runs - a long time to hold a squat position!

Rachel had her first wipe out, but it wasn't a big deal.  She also rode through the park for the first time, and went over her first real jumps and her first plastic box.

We were all about done just after lunch, and headed back to the car.  Our friends had given us keys to the resort hot tub, so we had a nice soak as snow flakes fell all around.

When we arrived at the turn on to I-70, we saw that the highway was closed.  We pulled over and waited and panicked because Ava was without too much extra milk and we weren't sure how long our drive home might be.  But, thankfully, the highway opened up after about 30 min and we were near the front of it all, and made it home without any further drama.

We are sad we didn't get to ski more this year.  There's a small chance we might get in one more day, so we aren't putting the skis away just yet.  But we have to decide what we are going to do for next year - which resort(s), are we going to rent a winter place, what passes, and if Rachel will enter a formal program.

Asking for help

This story is a tricky one to tell, because there are several perspectives.  My dad should tell his story.  Jason should tell his.  I will write mine.

Thurs, March 20 - I hear that my dad (aka Pops), who has been traveling in Morocco, crashed on his bike, and is in hospital.  My brothers spend the next few days trying to connect with him to learn more details.

We learn that he fell off his bike, broke 6 ribs on his left side, had a pneumothorax (collapsed lung), and had a chest tube in.

Being Spring break, we look into the cost of going to visit but it's way too expensive and it seems that dad is going to live to tell the tale without any long term effects.

My eldest brother Tony learns that my dad's travel insurance policy will pay for a family member to travel to Morocco to help Pops, if he is in hospital for 7 days.  We assume that he won't be in hospital too much beyond 7 days, but Tony looks into his options for making the trip.

Wed March 26 - Jason and I wake up and prepare to pack for our upcoming spring break vacation: cross country skiing in Granby, CO.  We make lists and I send Jason to the store for groceries while I get kids clothing organized with the girls.  Tony calls and tells me that Pops has now been in hospital over 7 days.  His chest tube has been removed and now they will keep him in hospital at least 7 more days for monitoring.  Although we know that Pops is safe, we are concerned that Pops is bored and lonely, since he knows nobody there and is just lying in a bed.  The travel insurance will pay for a family member to go and we want someone to go, but Tony cannot leave Canada for another 5-6 days.

I text Jason at the grocery store (9:19am): 'Dad is still in Morroco and insurance would pay for someone to go.  Any chance you want to go ASAP and could you take next week off school?'

Jason comes home.  We decide he should go.  He and Tony spend a lot of time sorting out the details and the next possible flight scenario is booked.  Jason is scheduled to leave at 4:30pm from the Denver airport.  Bus leaves at 2:20pm.  I'm supposed to work so I reschedule my patients for the afternoon so I can get Jason to the bus and watch the girls.

It's here that Jason should take over and write all about packing, luggage, seeing his mom, arriving in Agadir, seeing pops in the hospital, and adventures nearby.

At home, we were desperate for any news so eventually seeing pops and hearing his voice via FaceTime was awesome.  When Jason arrived, pops hadn't been out of bed for 9 days and was weak.  But each day he got stronger.  We weren't sure when pops would be cleared to fly and when they would fly home.  The unknown time frame on it all made me very anxious.

I ended up having the girls for 12 nights by myself.  Maybe for some people, that's not that crazy.  To us, that's pretty big. I'm actually really happy with how I coped... Especially once Jason had a return trip booked and I was in count-down mode.  Work was especially busy at this time and we didn't have any planning time to organize help.  Again, it made me wish we had a parent or sibling near by, but we don't.  It's pretty much just us, no matter what.

I'm not sure how single parents do it.  Most of my life and my conversations with friends now are about figuring out how to parent and still balance some other part of yourself - your household, your marriage, your health (sleep, eat, exercise), work, a social life... Every new parent I know struggles with this balance and how to make it work.

I have learned (and am still learning) that for me to cope and be happy, I need to ask for help.  I grew up never asking for help.  Ever.  I wanted to be fiercely independent.  I was taught not to impose.  I would struggle through impossible things in order to avoid asking for help or putting someone out.  I thought success meant doing it myself (except while on the field with a team).  I'm getting better.  Most of the time, I don't recognize that help would be a good thing and don't think to ask, but when it comes to watching my kids, I'm starting to get much more comfortable.  And thank goodness!  It makes life much easier.

When Rachel was born, we lived in Penticton and didn't have immediate family around to help us.  We had each other and did most things together as a family.  But I had friends and was social and felt supported, even if I didn't really feel like we had a babysitter option for more than 1-2 hours.

Moving to Colorado was tough because we had very little support.  We didn't go out on a real date until Rachel was 14 months old and it felt so complicated and expensive we didn't do it again for another 3 months.

In the last 12 days, though, I'm very proud of myself because I asked for help.  And having help and support around me has made me feel more comfortable here.  I've done gym daycare twice so I could swim.  I had a friend watch the kids so I could attend a work meeting.  I went to a cousin's for dinner.  I had a cousin watch Rachel while I took Ava to her sign language class.  I had a friend watch the kids twice so I could run and get groceries.  I also leaned on a couple close friends and family for emotional support.  So I feel like I have had loads of help and it has all gone quite well.

That's only the beginning of all the help we've had.  Jason's staff covered all sorts of things while he was out of school this last week, and a coworker will pick him up at the airport so I can stay home with the sleeping kids.  I know my brothers have done a lot of time on the phone and my dad himself was well taken care of.

So thank you, to all the angels out there, who have helped my dad and husband get back home safely. Thank you to the community of people who are helping raise my children, because one or two adults is not enough people to do it.

And let's all remember to ask for help and to lend a hand when we can, because things are much easier when we all work together.

This little adventure started out a bit crazy, and a bit scary, but once the dust settles down, it's going to be a great story.  Jason and my Dad had some amazing adventures, and some quality time together.  I learned a lot about myself and my girls, and I'm thankful on how it all turned out.